AtLA musical ABC
by Katna Serafin
Summary: One-shots based on songs with titles on each letter from the alphabet in the world of AtLA. Kind of AU.
1. Always

**A/N**

**Hello there!**

**I'm back with something new! first one-shot in AtLA world :)**

**This one based on s****ong: Saliva - "Always"**

**_enjoy!_**

* * *

**_Fire Nation's Capital City:_**

She rolled on her other side, not being able to find a suitable place. There was something wrong all the time. How was it possible that she couldn't find a place on her own bed, which she has always found the most comfortable ever?  
The answer was simple. And no, it wasn't bed's fault. It was her, or more likely her thoughts. It was them, circling in her head anxiously, that didn't allow Zana to rest. Because as soon as she found a comfortable place and closed her eyes, she saw his face but not with a smile or kindness. His face was full of disappointment and pain.  
She clenched her teeth. Idiot. Why couldn't he understand that she had no other choice? Because she didn't. She had to lie to him, she had to lie to all of them. And later she wanted to tell him, she wanted to explain him everything. But he was too proud to listen. So it's not her business anymore. But it's a pity that the shame was still burning and she was unable to drown out the remorse.  
Why was she thinking of him all the time anyway? Why did she still have him in her head when he seemed to have forgotten about her? Who the hell was he that she missed him so much? She curled, grabbing the pillow strongly. It felt like a thousand needles were pierced in the middle of her chest, causing her incredible pain. It hurt so badly, especially, when she realized that she couldn't live without this boy. She was choking slowly, like she was gradually running out of oxygen. It was her slow death.  
And he … he didn't even say goodbye. He didn't come when she was leaving. The only thing she got was the letter. The letter which she had already known by heart and which was redemption for her. Because those words gave her at least a gleam of hope that it would be better someday. And always even a tiny gleam is far more better than no gleam at all.  
Always.

**_Village on the North Pole:_**

It was too much for him. He always thought that these types of issues were not for him. And now he had a proof.  
He was a kind of a person which wanted to have everything under control and for this time he had. He was feeling safe thanks to that, he knew that no matter how bad things were, he could handle them, sooner or later. His abilities as a medium were also very helpful. But in Zana's case it was different. It ruined everything, introducing so unwanted, even undesired chaos. He walked around his room nervously for another time and a moment later he sat on his bed.  
He didn't know what to do, what to think. This girl awoke extreme feelings in him. On the one hand he couldn't refuse that he needed her. He missed her voice, her warmth, her smell. But on the other hand, even though he understood why she had done what she had, he couldn't forget that she deceived them. That she deceived him. And that made him stay away from her. Besides, she was a princess after all. What possibly could he give her?  
And that was the way his thoughts were going. He wanted her by his side as much as he wanted her vanish from this world. He loved her and hated as well. He couldn't take it anymore. It was destroying him, burning from the inside. He hit the wall with his fist.  
Because of that he didn't say goodbye to her, when Zana's brother was taking her home. Hema was afraid that he could tell something what he would regret to the end of his life. The only thing he was able to do was to write a letter, and even this was hard for him as hell.  
In this one moment he made his decision. He had to do something with that situation. And the only way to end it was meeting Zana. Although he knew it might be quite hard, he couldn't give up.  
He always had to have everything under control.  
Always.


	2. Better days

**A/N**

**And next one-shot, this time based on song:**

**Breaking Benjamin 'Better days"**

* * *

**EN:**

Zuko walked through the corridor, aiming to his chamber. It took him a long time to deal with the paperwork, so he was quite sure that everyone was already asleep. That's why he was surprised when he saw a streak of light from his sister's room. He stopped for a moment and then, a bit concerned, he came closer. The door opened noiselessly as he pushed them. Zana was sitting on a windowsill, with her legs embraced with her arms, staring at starry sky. Her thoughts must have floated far away because she didn't seem to realize that Zuko entered the room.  
'Still on your feet?' he asked softly, sounding like a mother admonishing a child.  
The girl turned toward him suddenly as she heard his voice, but soon she recognized him and even smiled to him softly.  
'I can't sleep …' she replied, turning her head.  
'You're not ill, are you?' Zuko came to her, touching Zana's forehead with his hand.  
'No, no' she said immediately to calm him. 'I feel fine… more or less…'  
As long as she was speaking, Zuko could caught her sight. But after she finished she turned away her head again. The Fire Lord looked his younger sister up and down carefully. The sixteen-year-old did not look good. Her already fair skin gained an unhealthy chalky tone. There were dark circles under her eyes, proving it wasn't the first night the girl spent on the windowsill.  
'What's the matter, girl?' he asked and placed his hand on his sister's bended knees. 'You've been different since you came back here…'  
He saw her bite bottom lip; her breath became more nervous.  
'It … it's nothing, really' she whispered with her eyes stuck in the moon.  
The boy scowled slightly. He caught the girl's chin, forcing her to turn her head towards him.  
'Now, tell me the same looking into my eyes' he ordered.  
She didn't say a thing. She pulled him away to escape on her bed and cowered in the same way she did on the windowsill.  
'Zana…' he sat next to her. 'I'm your big brother and I can't take it, see you suffering like that. I want to help you, but I can't unless you tell me, what's going on…'  
He put his arm around her, not sure if it's a good idea. He didn't know how his sister would react. And she was sitting still, showing no reaction for his touch for a long while. Then, suddenly, she squeezed her eyes shut and trustfully clinged to her brother's chest. With her voice trembling she started talking about what happened when she was on the North Pole. About Hema. About her fear of showing her real identity and her lie. About the water bender's reaction when the truth came out.  
'He gave me a letter … only a letter … through his friend' she ended and sniffed quietly. 'I can't sleep, because every time I do, I see him before my eyes … I see his face … he's looking at me … with such despise' she shivered, clenching her finger stronger on his shoulder ' I spoiled everything, Zuko. I … I'm hopeless …  
He cuddled her more, cradling gently so as she was a little child.  
'There, there ' he whispered, stroking girl's hair' You're tired, sis. Stop bothering, at least for a while. Try to sleep. And tomorrow we'll think about solving this.'  
She sobbed lightly and curled more in her big brother's arms. For the first time since she came to the palace she felt really safe. For the first time she felt it can be all right.


	3. Can't get you out of my head

**A/N**

**Here we go again!**

**Song: Makowiecki band - "Can't get you out of my head"**

* * *

'Zana, wait …'  
'Save your breath.'  
'Please, talk with me …'  
'No way!'  
Stunned citizens of Fire Nation's Capitol City saw their princess aiming ahead with hurry, and a water tribe boy following her. In this moment Hema was unspeakably happy that Zana didn't care about what she 'should' do as a princess, and most of the time she was walking alone, on her feet.  
'Zana, I beg you' he finnaly catched her wrist, as they reached almost empty place, and forced to turn around. 'At least listen to me ...  
It was the first time he saw her so out of nerves, that's for sure. He was even afraid for a while that she will use fire bending against him, but she only teared her hand out.  
'I begged you too … when I wanted to explain everything, before I left your village' she cried, clenching her fists. 'You didn't listen to me then … why should I listen to you now?!'  
Hema's lips moved noiselessly. He needed a second to find right answer in his mind.  
'We both made mistakes' though he said this quietly and more calmly than before, Zana heard him perfectly. 'I've understand some things …  
She crossed her arms on her chest. She was obviously angry, but at least it seemed she's going to listen him.  
'Well? What kind of things?' she asked when water bender wasn't eager to go further with explanations.  
He hardly cleared his throat. How should he say it for not making his words silly and cliché? …  
'What I mean was … that I … that you …ehm ...'  
Zana rolled her eyes impatiently.  
'Oh, just say it! You hadn't problems with speaking your mind last time.' she smirked.  
She was right. He had to pull himself together, other way it wouldn't work. He took a deep breath.  
'I can't get you out of my head.' he began with unexpected firmness.' I've tried everything to get rid of it. All last month long I've been doing nothing else but trying not thinking about you, to be honest. In vain. Total failure. I can't, I'm not able to. I have no idea what you've done to me, but you addicted me successfully, no doubt. I couldn't stand it.  
She was surprised. He saw it in her changed mimic, in her wide opened eyes. However, she calmed down quickly.  
'And you came here just to say this?' she snorted, but she was less firm than before.  
This time Hema smirked.  
'Of course not. You know, if I can't quit my addiction, I came to the place, where my drug is.'  
He risked and made few steps closer to her. She didn't moved, although she wanted at first. Her anger and resistance was melting, he have seen it and wanted to keep it going. He came a bit closer, wondering how far he can go.  
'You're such a jerk!' she cried with a bit trembling voice. 'If you think that those pretty words would be enough, you …'  
He didn't allow her to finish. Before she could react, he took her face in his hands and grab her lips in a kiss. He was risking much, he knew that. But he had to do this. He had to and he wanted as well. He didn't know how long it was, until he ended it.  
'Will this be enough, my lady?' he asked, looking at Zana.  
She was obviously confused. For a long while she was only moving her lips, without any sound.  
'You … you … you …' she stammered, raising her hand as she wanted to slap him in the face, but a second after she lowered it and unexpectedly clinged to him. 'I missed you ...


	4. Did it again

**A/N**

**Here comes another letter :)**

**Song: Shakira- "Did it again"**

* * *

She did it again. She sneaked off the palace in the night again to go there. She was doing it for a month now, twice a week. She knew her family wouldn't be happy if they found it out. Nay, wouldn't be happy is far too gently. Zana was quite sure, that Zuko would get mad, same as her mother and uncle. But for now, none of them knew about her night trips. The district where the party was organized wasn't nice at all, especially at night, but young princess doesn't care. Only one thing was important to her now: dance. She always loved it but since she came to the palace she hadn't much occasions to dance. Besides, no one here cares who she is. The only thing that matters was her moves. When she came to the party place, she stops for a while, checked her hairstyle and smiled, as she heard the music. She came in without any problems. Inside she felt familiar stench and crowd, though it wasn't so crowded as usually. She stand at the bar.  
'Hey, sweetie' the barman greet her. 'The usual?'  
Yann had already remembered her and her usual order. She only nodded with a smile, and a moment later she got full glass of firerose juice.  
'Anyone interesting today?' she asked casually.  
Barman shake his head.  
'All the same' he replied but after a while he added. 'No, wait. There's one guy I've never seen before … he's not even from the Fire Nation …'  
Zana's eyebrows moved, and there was a glimmer of interest in her eyes  
'Who?'  
Yann's chin moved, showing her a figure of a boy, who was sitting by the table in the darker part of the room. The girl recognized Water Tribe clother.  
'What is he doing here?' she mumbled, partly to herself.  
'No idea' said Yann. 'But he could at least change his clothes … he wouldn't be so recognizable.'  
The sixteen-year-old giggled and payed for her drink. She took the glass and came closer to the stranger. Among all the people there, he was nearly the only one who was sitting all alone. It was strange, because even if someone came here alone, mostly it doesn't take long to find a company. And this boy seemed like he actually wanted to be alone.  
'Hey there' she stared, standing by his table. 'What are you doing here? You haven't such parties in Water Tribe?'  
The boy quivered as he heard her voice but Zana didn't noticed it unless he raised his bowed head. The stranger turned out not to be a stranger anymore. Princess hardly stopped herself from screaming.  
'Hema?!' she squealed, feeling confused about seeing him. 'What the hell are you doing here?'  
The medium seemed to be as confused as she.  
'I can ask you the same' he hissed, grabbing her wrist and forcing her to sit in front of him. 'I don't think it's appropriate place for a princess. Does your brother know that you're here?'  
She snorted, pulling her hand.  
'No' she replied and looked at him. 'And you won't tell him, will you?'  
Hema sighed. Why was he surprised after all?  
'No' he said more calmly.  
Zana breathed with relief.  
'But you still didn't tell me, why are YOU here?' she asked, taking a sip of juice.  
Water Tribe boy just shrugged.  
'I have no idea ...'  
Girl smiled mischievously.  
'Well, you came to a party!' said princess and this time she grabbed his wrist. 'Come on, let's dance!'  
He wanted to object, refuse, or preferably take her from here and get her back to the palace. But when he saw that glimmer in Zana's eyes, when he saw her smile, all his resistance gone. He allowed the sixteen-year-old to took him on the dance floor.  
'Zana!' she heard his whisper. 'I'm not ...  
'I don't want to hear that' she interrupted, standing before him.  
She leaned to him, as her ear cached first tones of faster melody.  
'Let's make a show' she whispered. 'A fight without bending, get it?'  
He does. And though he was still thinking it's crazy, he didn't refuse anymore. Both of them make their positions and so they started their own dance. Zana uses all fire bending forms she knew, being careful to not bend at all. She matches the figures to the rhythm of the music, changing them just in time it was needed. The same was with Hema, using his typical water bending forms. Their every move, despite of differences, was perfectly harmonized. Both of them were paying much attention on the other moves, matching not only to the music, but to each other as well. Not even one bow, jump or gesture were accidental. It would look like a real fight if they weren't adding risings, hipping or improvising figures to their dance. They didn't realize that more and more people stopped and started to watch them, enjoying their show. Dancing pair didn't know how long it take. But instinctively feeling that the song comes to an end, Zana made a few spins, getting closer to the boy, while he, hearing surely last tones of the song, took girls hand and pulled to himself, leaning her. Even if she was confused, it last only a second. Then she put all her weight on one leg, letting Hema hold her. Then she realized how many people were watching them, and that she was nearly breathless. She looked up on still leaned boy.  
'You're not dancing, huh?' she mumbled, catching his arm and standing on her feet.  
Water bender smirked.  
'Actually I wanted to say, that I'm not sure if you can keep up with me.'  
He moved in last moment to avoid princess poke.


	5. Enjoy the silence

**A/N**

**So, here we go :)**

**song: Lacuna Coil - "Enjoy the silence"**

* * *

He didn't know, what exactly woke him. Boy's eyes opened slowly, as he felt a breath of fresh air on his face. Almost immediately he noticed that he lies in the bed alone. Holding up a bit he soon saw a person sitting on a small balcony. He smirked, leaning more comfortably on his elbow. The water bender have already used to it that his girlfriend was waking with the sun everyday just to meditate in it's first rays. She used to say that it gives her strength for whole day. And he was usually waking in a half of this morning ritual of her.  
Hema's sight was analyzing every single detail of meditating girl body once again. Her waist length, dark hair was now gathered in a sloppy knot. She was sitting still, straight, with her legs characteristically crossed, and hands leaned softly on her lap. Only the steady moves of her chest were a sign that she's actually alive. Girls face, partly hidden by her hair, was calm. She had her eyes closed, and there was a soft smile on her pretty shaped, rosy lips. Sunrise surrounded her with it's glare, creating an amazing golden glow around Zana. It seemed like the sun was rising even slower, to let the rays touch and play longer on places, where princess skin was bare. He just loved watching her in the moments like this. She was then even more beautiful for him than usually. He could spend ages, observing the golden reflections playing on the girl's neck and cleavage, on her face. Giving the fire bender's hair this amazing tone. He was afraid of taking deeper breath, to not spoil this moment. He was able only to lay, with his eyes glued to Zana.  
Even Mish used to calm down then, and noiselessly jump on the bed, curling next to Hema, waiting with the boy until her lady stop meditating. There were few moments, when he was wondering if he could come near his beloved princess and interrupt her morning ritual by some sweet nothings. But as soon as he got this kind of thoughts, he found them incredibly stupid. Firstly, because he really doubt, if he would be able to even get up, not mention getting closer to Zana, or saying anything to her. Secondly, why the hell should he spoil something that was nearly sacred for him?  
Because while meditating, in his eyes she seemed to be like some young, beautiful goddess, who accidentally appeared in this world.  
No. It was definitely better to not say anything. To not say anything and celebrate this moment with the princess in sweet silence. Wait just for a few to several minutes until the girl will turn to him herself. Hema doesn't have to predict to know, what will happened next. The smile on her face will grow, he'll see this familiar mischievously gleam in her golden eyes, which he loved so much. Then, she'll get up slowly, gracefully, to come to him with a light step. She'll lean, and after a soft kiss, will lay next to him, putting her head on his chest. It was always this way, though. Everyday, since he started to live with her in the palace. And while holding Zana, Hema was sure, that all he ever wanted was there, in his arms.  
In this particular moments they never say a thing. There was no need for it. And even a single word could destroy this amazing atmosphere of their mornings. Words were very unnecessary. Why we should spoil something that was giving them so much peace and happiness?  
It was far more pleasurable to enjoy this special whiles in silence. To let their eyes and moves speak. Because they both knew, that when the service will come to the chamber with the breakfast, all the magic will disappear. So, they wanted to get enough of it as long as the could, before they'll come back to the reality.  
And so in every morning.


	6. Fighter

**A/N**

**Another one!**

**Song: Christina Aguilera - 'Fighter'**

* * *

The sound of opening door forced him to open his eyes. He saw a gleam of light appearing, and a while later some female entered the cell.  
'Hello, father.'  
Man's eyes widened as he heard the sound of her voice.  
'Azula!' He came closer to prison bars immediately. 'What are you doing here? Your brother didn't imprisoned you?'  
The girl sat, facing him, being incredibly clam. She looked at her father up and down. And she started to ask herself, what the hell she saw in this man.  
'No' she replied finally. 'He put me in the hospital again, but I've been released, as you can see.'  
Ozai seemed to be both shocked and outraged. 'How dare he?! Still …'  
'He dared, he did this, and I'm grateful for that ' she interrupted.  
'What happened to you, Azula?' he looked at his daughter with amaze.  
Light smile appeared on her lips.  
'Kind of metamorphosis. When I was in the hospital again I had plenty of time to think everything over. It's funny that I wasn't able to do this through four years, and I actually managed in half a year … but yet, I have. I analyzed my whole life, very carefully. Every moment, every success, every failure, everything. And I came to some very interesting conclusions. Want to hear them?' she silenced for a moment, and when he didn't said a thing, she continued. 'I understood, that we were only sick maniacs, who cared for nothing else but power. Notice this word, 'maniacs'. Yes, I used it in completely negative meaning. You know, I'm starting to think, that this six months were so productive for me thanks to Zana. She's amazing, I tell you.'  
Though her father didn't say a thing for a long time, she saw disbelief in his eyes.  
'Stop looking at me this way' Azula snorted. 'My mind was never so clear before' she came a little bit closer. 'Dad, just think about it. Look, what we've become! What happened to our family! Because of this sick lust of power we lost our humanity.'  
'We were supposed to create new, better world! …' Ozai's face darkened.  
Azula laughed.  
'Father, please' she rolled her eyes. 'The truth is, we were ready to make the worst things, just to keep, and later get the power back. Like you to mom and to Zuko … and we to Zana ...'  
'Your mother have done that on her own will' he interrupted.  
She raised her eyebrow.  
'You're kidding me, right? She did it to protect Zuko, 'cause you wanted to be a Fire Lord!' she looked directly and surely into her father eyes. 'You've never gave us true family, nor Zuko, nor me, not mention our little sister. And don't deny it! Even for me it was enough to say 'no' to you just once, and I was falling from grace ... still don't get it? What great-grandfather Sozin started, turned into a huge disaster. And thank Agni, that when you banished Zuko, you let uncle go with him, and that he already found the right path then. And that they managed to stop this madness ...'  
Ozai growled impatiently.  
'Why have you come here? To remind me how terrible father I was?' he said a bit louder than before, and then an ugly smirk appeared on his face. 'You were as bad as me.'  
But the girl didn't seemed to be touched by his words.  
'I know I was, I admit it and regret what I've done with all my heart. I've already prayed for my siblings forgiveness.' she replied 'And it wasn't my intention to remind you anything or despise you. Fortunately, all that you've done turn out to be good for us. It made us stronger. I must say, that this one you made really well. You made us fighters, and Zana … well, she had to take care of herself and mom. Anyway, I came for something else …'  
She get closer again and raised her hand hesitantly. The ex Fire Lord stared at her confused, as she moved her fingers through the bars and softly touched his cheek.  
'With Zuko and Zana we will do our best to clean this hundred-year mess … and it wouldn't be right, if we'll be still despising you' she smiled lightly, but as soon as she noticed her father's expression, Azula felt a mixture of grief and sadness. 'You ... you don't regret anything you've done? Not a single thing? ...'  
Ozai moved his hand and he touched his daughter cheek.  
'Yes … I regret' he begin, and saw a gleam of hope in her eyes. 'I regret that I allow this bastard to change you.'  
She jumped and take few steps back, turning from her father. She didn't cry, though his words harmed her. A good thing from Ozai's upbringing. She was strong.  
'Too bad, father' she whispered 'but maybe it's too early … I'll come again, all right?'  
He didn't say a thing, and she walked out of the cell. Only when she was coming back to the palace, one tear run down her face.


	7. Goodnight my angel

**A/N**

**Here we go! :)**

**Celtic Woman - 'Goodnight my angel'**

* * *

It was late, when she was coming back to her home from the village. She babysat a group of children in time of their parents absence, which had some official matters in neighborhood city. They have encouraged Zana to spend a night with them, but actually she wanted to come back to Zuko and uncle, waiting for her at home. As she was expecting, it was dark everywhere, except the living room, where she saw a soft light, possibly from the fireplace. But only when she came into the house, she noticed someone sitting next to the hearth. A soft smile appeared on her lips just as she recognized her brother, staring at burning wood.  
'I thought you would be both asleep' she said quietly, making few steps closer to him.  
Zuko turned his sight to her, not realizing she was there until now. 'Uncle felt asleep immediately' he said. 'I couldn't.'  
She sat next to him. 'Somethings wrong?' she asked, watching the Fire Lord carefully.  
'No, no' he respond, shaking his head, but seeing the girl's face, he added 'Really, everything is fine … I mean …' he sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, which was now completely down. 'I thought about what you've said. About mom and you …'  
The sixteen-year-old interrupted him by waving her hand.  
'You were supposed to forget about that … I was angry and bitter then, I've said stupid things ...'  
He only nodded. 'I know … but still … maybe you were right in some way' he turned his sight to the wood again. 'If I had come here earlier … If I had taken Katara with me … I don't know … maybe mom would be still alive …'  
The girl bit her bottom lip. 'It wasn't you fault … you didn't know anything' she said after a long while, and then she stretched out her hands. 'Come here …'  
It was enough that he move only a bit closer. Zana embraced her brother and pulled him to her. They cuddled for a while and after that the boy just curled next to her and laid his head on girls lap. The princess smiled softly and by one hand she started to stroke his hair, and the other she placed on her brother's shoulder. She placed herself more comfortable, as a sudden idea came to her mind. She moved her fingers softly through his hair once again.  
'Just try to sleep' she whispered and a moment later a silent humming came from her mouth. 'Goodnight my angel. Time to close your eyes' she hesitantly started a lullaby, once girls mother sang to her 'And save these questions for another day.  
I think I know what you've been asking me.  
I think you know what I've been trying to say.  
I promise I would never leave you.  
And you should always know, I never will be far away.'  
Zuko's eyes widened with disbelief as he recognized the song. But still, he didn't move. He embraced his sister knees more tightly and closed his eyes, listening to Zana's voice.  
'Goodnight my angel, now it's time to sleep.  
And still so many things I want to say.  
Remember all the songs you sang for me.  
When we went sailing on a emerald bay' she continued, with a smile on her face, still stroking her brothers hair to calm him down. 'And like a boat out on the ocean.  
I'm rocking you to sleep.  
The water is dark and deep inside this mother's heart.  
You'll always be a part of me.'  
The Fire Lord felt a single tear running down his face. How long ago it was, when he heard this words last time, from his mother's mouth? It was his favorite lullaby. There was no other that could silence him, and put to sleep faster.  
'Goodnight my angel, now it's time to dream.  
And dream how wonderful your life will be.' he felt Zana's fingers brushing his cheek. ' Some day a child may cry and if you sing this lullaby.  
Then in your heart there will always be a part of me.'  
She silenced for a moment, just to gaze at Zuko's face and then she started humming again. It was enough to repeat this lullaby only once. When she stopped singing, she realized that her brother was breathing far more calmly, and that his body weighed more on her legs than before. She giggled and also closed her eyes, with one her hand still on his shoulder. And it was how their uncle saw them in the morning.


	8. Hear me

**A/N**

**And another ;)**

**Song: Kelly Clarkson - 'Hear me'**

* * *

Second week just passed, since she was here all alone. And it was only her fault. She could only blame herself for that. On her own will she spurned her brother's helping hand. Because, despite of that Zuko came to her few weeks after their mom's death and funeral, and though he wanted to take her with him to the palace, she refused. And actually 'refused' is not a good word. She had almost literally thrown him out of her house, telling him to get out of her sight for good and leave her alone. Oh, how much she was regretting her words now!  
Though she was doing her best, since that day nothing was the way it should. Theoretically she was doing well, she was independent. Non of her village inhabitants saw that there was something wrong with Zana. They were even surprised by how quick the sixteen-year-old get over her mother's death. How she was handling with all things. But that was only apparently.  
She curled up on the edge of a cliff, which started to be her favorite place lately. She had perfect view on the sea and the haven from that place. And she just couldn't stay long in her house anymore. The silence there was almost ringing, and the emptiness was frightening her. At every sound similar to opening door she was hoping that it was her brother. That he didn't care about what she said and just came to take her from this place. Unfortunately, it was never Zuko. Every time she was facing the same bitter disappointment. She was already sick of it. Until those two weeks she didn't realize how big mistake she made chasing the Fire Lord away. She have never felt so lonely and insecure. She never wanted to have someone close by her side so much. But to her annoyance, none ship from the Fire Nation came to the island, not even a tiny one. Because Zana was so desperate that she could beg any merchant, anyone with the ship or boat, to take her to the Fire Nation territory. And then she would get into the palace by herself, even by force. She was the bloody princess after all! She shut her eyes, to not let the tears run. She moved her one hand to the bracelet her brother left for her when he was here last time.  
'Where are you know?' she whispered in the air. 'You've left, though you were promising me that you won't leave me now. That nothing would separate us. That I won't be alone. And now what?' she silenced for a moment, as tears took her speech. 'Now you don't even know how much I'm waiting for you. You don't know how afraid I am … how much I want to have you by my side now ...  
Loud weeping came from her mouth. She curled more, if it was even possible, all shivering.  
'If only you could hear me now' she sobbed. 'I was so stupid … what the hell was I thinking? … You know … I was afraid of what you wanted to give me. How you wanted to turn my world upside down. But I am ready now! I really am! I realized that I won't handle it by myself. No matter how hard I tried, this loneliness is killing me. I have enough, I can't take it anymore. I understood that I need you, I need you more than I ever thought. Can you hear me?! I need you right here, right now! … For all that I've got, I swear! … Can you hear me?!  
Suddenly she felt incredibly cold, almost freezing. Girl's small body was trembling, and new tears were running down her face. Though she knew it was impossible, she was desperately praying for a miracle that her brother would somehow hear her. Hear, and take her away from this place, through which she was slowly losing her mind. And the miracles could be, when you believe, aren't they? That was why the girl jumped up, when she heard a silent rustling behind her. She turned around immediately, but the only thing she was able to see was a wild bird, which floated away in the same moment. She remained still for a while, and after that she groaned and curled up on the ground again.  
'Hear me …' she whispered desperately once again. 'Please …'  
Even when she knew that the only one to hear her voice would be the blowing wind. And only the wind would hear her sobbing.


	9. It's the fear

**A/N**

**Hello again ;)**

**Song: Within Temptation - 'It's the Fear'**

* * *

He saw her in the garden, when he was walking from one part of the palace to another. Aang stopped for a moment, watching the girl who was sitting near the pond. She was there alone, thoughtful, throwing pieces of bread she was holding to the turtleducks. Something was certainly bothering her, he saw it. That was why he slowly started getting closer, forgetting about the library he was aiming to. His avatar instinct was telling him that he should have a little talk with her.  
'Hey' he said softly when he was a few meters from her yet. 'How are you?'  
As she heard his voice, Azula turned to the newcomer. An unhappy smile appeared on her face as she recognized him.  
'I've been better' she replied, and when he sat next to her, she added. 'I'm glad to see you, actually. I … need some 'avatar wisdom', I think …'  
The air bender looked at his friend's sister amazed. It was unlike to her asking anyone for help, but the words she just said was even more worrisome than anything. At least for him.  
'I'm starting to worry … what's the matter?' he asked.  
First few seconds she remain silent, trying to put her thoughts in the rightest words.  
'The thing is …' she started, but then she paused and bit her bottom lip. 'Do you really think that I am able to change myself? ...'  
The corner of Aang's lips raised.  
'Of course I do. Haven't you done that already?' he responded.  
All last year long, since she returned to the palace, Azula really have changed. Not only the way she was behaving, but also how she looked, was proving her metamorphosis. The avatar looked the princess up and down. She was wearing traditional Fire Nation robes, and now she have the hairstyle similar to her mother's. But it seemed that the boy's words wasn't satisfying for Azula.  
'Yeah, sure' she grumbled. 'I have no idea, how Zuko managed to do this, but I can't any longer …' her fists clenched. 'I thought that the worst is over … that it would be different now … easier … bullshit!'  
Aang frowned. 'What are you talking about?'  
He saw as her chin shivered.  
'I'm saying that I haven't change that much' she said coldly, and then she turned her face from the pond, to the air bender. 'Aang, how it's possible, that no matter how hard I try, I just can't forgive him? That the hate is burning me from the inside, when not so long ago I admired him and wanted to be like him?' she bended her knees, and hid her face in it. 'I don't know that to do, what to think …'  
She felt, as the boy put gently his hand on her shoulder. Now he knew perfectly, who Azula was talking about.  
'It's so stupid!' she groaned with irritation. 'He hurt Zuko or Zana more, and they were able to kind of forget him … what's wrong with me?! …' she quickly turned to him. 'I'll tell you what. It's everything because of him! All my life, he was telling me that I can gain everything by fear. That trust and mercy are weaknesses! It's his …' she stopped and groaned again. 'You see?! That's what I'm talking about! It's a vicious circle!' she embraced her head with her hands.  
'Give yourself more time' said Aang calmly 'You've been through a lot lately.'  
He heard a quiet snort.  
'Seriously?' she mumbled. 'Last half a year I was hoping that father will somehow escape from the prison. I really was. You know why?' she looked into avatars eyes. 'Because then I would have a perfect opportunity to get him' she scowl, and bow her head. 'But I don't want to do any harm anymore!'  
If she have looked at him then, she would see a soft smile on his face.  
'You know what? I think I know someone who had similar perplexities as you' hearing this words the princess sat straight immediately.  
'Who?' she asked half disbelieving, half curious.  
'Your brother' he said, and seeing her face, his smile widened' Oh, right … he didn't tell you yet, did he? Remember that strange sickness that you've got during this half-year stay in asylum?'  
Azula blinked, surprised. 'Yeah ...but what …'  
'This sickness wasn't natural' interrupted Aang gently. 'And Zuko have been through it as well. It was before the war ended, when he and general Iroh were in Ba Sing Se. It was the critical moment for both of you, time of metamorphosis. That point at the bottom, from which you bounced. But still, it doesn't mean that he was good since then.'  
'I was just about to say that' she replied thoughtfully. 'Because it must have been before I came there, before …' she paused suddenly, and a light blush appeared on her cheeks.  
'Exactly' said Aang, not discouraged. 'It was before our fight in the cavern, before you took him home. You see? He also needed time to find the right path.'  
The princess only shook her head.  
'But I found the path already … I mean … I know that it was you, uncle and Zuko, who were right, and that peace is better than war, and that all elements and nations have to live in harmony.'  
This time Aang chuckled, shaking his head.  
'Don't bother Ozai now' he said, and after he patted gently her shoulder, he got up slowly from the ground. 'You're still struggling within. That's why I said you need to give yourself more time. When you'll have peace of mind again, then you handle everything else.' he smiled and was about to walk away, but then he stopped for a while. 'Oh, and by the way … go talk with Zuko. He can help you.'  
Azula watched as he walked away, after waving his hand for goodbye. She was sitting still for a while, thinking about the words the avatar said. _Maybe he's right?_, she thought. Then she got up from the ground gracefully, and walked to her brother chambers.


	10. Journey to the past

**A/N**

**And another one! Hope you'll ejnoy, and...**

**you know, reviews are awsome, right? ;)**

**Song: Aliyah - 'Journey to the past'**

* * *

'Grandpa, grandpa!' cheerful voice of a child sounded on palace corridor, echoing up to the garden.  
Zuko smiled softly, and took another sip of his tea. He wasn't worrying about being found. Little Iroh have discovered his hiding before. And though now retired Fire Lord was here to have some rest and peace, he knew that this scamp's presence wouldn't upset him. And just as he expected, while later a six-year-old boy rushed into the arbour. He moved toward the sitting man immediately and literally jump on a free place next to him.  
'Grandpa, tell me about yours and uncle Aang's adventures!' asked the toddler, giving his grandfather a pleading look.  
'You know your mother won't be happy about it' said the former Fire Lord. 'You'll hear enough about it from teachers in school, according to her.'  
Boy puffed out his cheeks in discontent.  
'But I want to hear that from you!' this time it was a demand, and though he crossed arms on his chest to show his determination, but then he clung to the man, giving his puppy dog eyes. 'Please, grandpa! Pleaaaaaaaaaaaase!'  
The old man sighed, put his cup on the nearby table and just a second after he took the boy to put him on his own lap.  
'Alright then. What do you want to hear about first?' he asked, looking warmly at his grandson.  
A huge grin appeared on boy's face.

~ * * * ~

Zana heard their voices just when she walked to he gardens. She shook her head lightly and walked towards the arbour.  
'Here you are' she greeted them, leaning against the frame of the entrance.  
Iroh jumped up and run to her to cling to womans legs.  
'Grandpa was telling me stories!' he told proudly, rising his sight at her.  
Zana looked at her brother, who only shrugged and sip a tea from his cup.  
'And I bet it was a fascinating story' she run her fingers through boy's hair. 'You disappeared for qite a long time. Your mom is looking for you, Iroh. Go to her, she's in her office.'  
Though the 6-year-old wasn't pleased, but he obeyed her words. In the meantime, Zana made few steps inside the arbour, to sit next to Zuko.  
'What precisely have you told him about?' she asked with a smile on her face.  
'Precisely?' her brother chuckled. 'I had to tell him about all my exile. And then, answer many questions.'  
They both laughed, but then, man looked at his sister carefully.  
'Look at us … a pair of oldies, telling their grandson a stories from their youth' he shook his head with disbelief. 'And when all this happened? It seems like just yesterday, I brought you and mom back to the palace, not without troubles, I have to add ...'  
Zana's face became serious immediately.  
'We had a good life, brother. And let me say that the world owes you and Aang quite a lot.' she said.  
'You're right, you're right' he waved his hand lightly. 'But it's nice to make that kind of journey to the past, you know? Maybe we'll gather our gaang and make that journey we had once again, eh? Visit the old places?'  
Woman raised her eyebrow.  
'Well, well, so you still have strength to go to a journey around the world?'  
'And you don't?' Zuko grinned, and then they both burst into laughter again.


End file.
